When Life is Perfect Pain

"We never are too old for this, my dear, because it is a play we are playing all the time in one way or another. Our burdens are here, our road is before us, and the longing for goodness and happiness is the guide that leads us through many troubles and mistakes to the peace which is a true Celestial City." -Little Women

Sometimes life is perfect, and sometimes life is painful but then there is perfect pain, when all is right excpet one thing and that one thing just isn't getting better.

My life is a dance of bliss and love....of morning cuddles, rain drops soaking into dry earth, gray sky sparkling silver, and little feet that live inside me kicking the drum beat of God's heart.

But then there's the river that runs underneath of me. A river that rushes and wont seem to stop, that knocks me off my feet, drags the breath out of my lungs and finds me whimpering on the floor.

For the past two months my dearest, lifelong, friend has been in the hospital fighting for her life. What should have been a common surgery has exhausted the brains and resources of her doctors and they

just

don't

know

why


she isn't getting any better. 

When I start to cry I try to think of the good times and the good times to come, whether in this world or somewhere on the other side of the veil. No matter what I WILL see my dear friend alive and well again I just pray that God doesn't decide to see her first. 

I try to think that she wouldn't want me to cry, that she would want me to laugh and smile and pray. She wouldn't want me to fret.

But it can be overwhelming this need to fret and this need to feel like I can control my life and hers. This need to think that because we are young

this

can't

happen.

We can't suffer and die. But we do. 

So every night, when life is still. When the dishes are done, when the children are sleeping, when my book has been set down.....I go through the labor pains of releasing and relaxing so I can let go of my will and give birth to God's.

Update: My dear, life long, best friend,  Heather Andrews, passed away on February 10th at 4:30 AM. She was literally the best person I ever knew and she will be our families angel until we see her again. 

Healthy Spin on Duggar Recipes

I love the Duggars. I love their cheerfulness, their parenting, their dedication to Heavenly Father and I love seeing how they cook for a large family (especially as mine grows!) One thing about the Duggars is that they don't have the same diet as I do but I have a lot of fun adapting their recipes to my own standards :) Here's a few of my favorites.

(For a complete list of Duggar recipes visit their website here)

"Tater Tot" Casserole 

Ingredients: 

• 2 lb ground, organic, grass fed beef cooked, seasoned, drained

• 6 lbs sliced potatoes, lightly steamed and tossed with butter and salt 
• 4 cups of chicken broth and 2 1/2 cups of sour cream blended together

 Directions:

1. Brown meat, and place in large casserole dish. 
2. Cover with potatoes. Mix chicken broth and sour cream together. 
3. Pour over top. Bake at 350 for 45 mins - 1 Hour.

*Makes 2-9”X13” pans (about 16 servings)
Recipe can be cut in half.

Banana Cake 

Ingredients: 

• 12 eggs, whites and yolks seperated
• 1/2 cup of coconut flour and a pinch of salt
• 1/2 cup of coconut sugar  
• 1 cup of whole milk
• 1 stick of pastured butter (1/4 lb)with a dash of lemon juice 
• 1/4-1/2 cup of honey and a dash of vanilla
• 5 bananas 

Directions:

1. Beat the egg whites until stiff, fold in coconut flour and sugar, and milk mix until well blended. Poor into greased cake pan and cook at 375 degrees for about 20-30 minutes (until golden brown on edges and center is solid)
2. While cake is baking heat butter and lemon juice in a sauce pan over low heat until melted. In a separate bowl beat egg yolks with honey and vanilla until well mixed. Add eggs to butter while beating mixture. Return to low heat and beat until the mixture thickens, remove from heat.
3. "Frost" the cake with the egg and butter custard. Slice bananas and layer over custard . Enjoy!

New Year's Resolutions

Today I thought I would share my New Year's Resolutions.

I'm of the opinion that no one should wait until the new year to improve their life or set goals but it's a great time when most people are reflecting on their lives and endeavoring to improve them. It seems like a great community effort toward progression and even though we all know the statistics on failing new years resolutions I'm of the strong opinion that...

"I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me."

- Philippians 4:13

Personally, I LOVE reading other people's new year's goals and intentions, it gives me ideas and inspiration! So without further ado, here are my big three :)

1. Be Calmer in My Daily Speaking

I'm an Aries and we are known for being all fire. I'm a spark, and when I get pushed around, I shout and yes, I even shout at my kids. I can't stand this about myself and I've been working on it for years. I even gave up yelling for Lent once. But I thought this time instead of focusing on "not yelling" I would focus on calm speech which is interesting because it's made me super aware of the words I use to and when they are uplifting and when they are not. I'm still yelling but the first step is to be aware of it and then tone it down as much as you can and I have been able to not yell on many occasions so I'm counting these as small steps toward victory.

2. Be More Aware of Others in Need

I have many ill friends and family right now and their illnesses have brought to my attention how much we all suffer in our own ways and how much we need care and concern from our friends, family and community. I recently sat down and made a list of friends and family who are ill or suffering and jotted down some ideas on how I could better serve them. I hope to keep this list ongoing during the year and set goals to save and visit family and friends who live far away more often. 

3. Provide Myself With More Rest and Reflection Time

I'm a stimulation junky. I usually have the radio on when I'm doing dishes or a Netflix streaming while I knit. Even when I "rest" I grab a book or magazine to entertain myself. I am no good at doing nothing. But it occurred to me recently how much we all need time to sit, reflect and absorb our lives. We can only gain wisdom through processing. 

We already don't have a TV but I cut back our online movie time drastically, by about 70%. We set smaller times spaced out throughout the week for family "movie time." Three days a week for a little bit in the afternoon we will sit down and watch a show together. Even then, I've also drastically cut back on what we watch, focusing on wholesome, modest things that give glory to God. I don't want to pollute my mind, or the minds of my children with too much fluff.

I've cut back on radio time too. Instead of playing Pandora or NPR all day while I go about chores I do so in silence (well, the silence afforded me by my 3 kids!) and I find myself pondering events and situations that needed reflection. 

I also cut back on non-scriptural reading. Reading for fun is crucial and needed but I find myself gravitating toward the "fun" stuff and neglecting my scriptures and Church magazines. With no movies or radio playing my children often ask me to read allowed as they play quietly and we have been sharing so many more Church messages and scriptures with each other lately! It's wonderful!

As far as the Internet goes I quit facebook for technical as well as personal reasons. My laptop recently broke and at first I thought I would naturally replace it (and as soon as possible!) but after reflecting a moment it seemed RIDICULOUS to have two computers in our house! How silly! So I decided simply to share my husbands computer which means I'm online A LOT less often and I have to be very thoughtful and intentional with my time online (because often there is an anxious hubby itchin' for his computer back! :)) I have a lot less information coming into my mind and much more time to process it fully. It's blissful!

Most importantly I have been able to really absorb my life on a deeper level. My mind is clearer and more refreshed, I'm less stressed both mentally and physically and I'm more aware of my own needs as well as the needs of my family.  To pass time that I would have spent engaged in a distracting form of media I often find myself cleaning or spending more time with my children.

What resolutions have you made? How are they working out so far?  

Good Housekeeping - Saturday and Sunday

 

My  messy boys :)

This week I am writing a series on good housekeeping. I'm sharing my rhythm and what works for me every day as I go about my week tidying up after all our boys! :)

Daily Wisdom

:: Dishes, 2-3 times per day

:: Straighten up main area for 10 minutes after each meal time

:: Check the chickens

:: Brush the dog

:: Read my scriptures

 

 

Saturday

:: Clean Outside

When we clean outside we start with the coop. We rake the sand clean, put fresh litter inside and clean out the roost boxes and lay down fresh straw. Then we sweep down the back porch and clear up any clutter we find laying around. If you have access to your garage (my husband wont let me in there, it's his domain :)) then you should clean up and sweep the garage. In the front yard we clean up the dog doo, sweep the walk ways and driveway, wipe down the outside windows, pick toys up, mow the lawn (yes, I do this LOL even four months pregnant!), and make note of any repairs that need work.

:: Clean the Car

Depending on how dirty your car is you should clean out trash and vacuum. Every once in while pull out the car seats, vacuum under them and wash them or wipe them down. Wash the outside of the car as needed (I don't bother in the winter LOL)

 

:: Bath Night

I clean the children and myself throughout the week as needed but bath night is when we get super scrubby. I make sure all the bits and pieces are washed clean, hair is shampooed and conditioned, nails are scrubbed clean, ears are cleaned out, nails trimmed, etc - everyone is squeaky clean on bath night!

 

A Sabbath dinner

Sunday

:: Church

Sundays in our home are reserved for church, rest, reflection and family. We go to church from 10 AM-1 PM. I strongly encourage families to spend one day a week engaged in spiritual activity. Find a church, temple, synagogue, mosque, drumming circle, a fellowship of some sort and use that day to rest and reflect on your Creator. 

:: Media Free Day

We also use Sundays to practice media free time. No radio, no secular music, no movies, no Internet, no non-religious reading materials, etc. Giving your mind, body and spirit a break from constant stimulation is needed. Your mind needs to reflect and refresh which it cannot do unless you sit and do nothing.

 

Nothing is an adjustment. At first you'll be REALLY bored but you will get use to it and it will amaze you what you find to pass the time. I usually end up talking to my husband and children about my thoughts. I'm a big talker and with nothing to distract us we end up sitting around exchanging stories, ideas, news, etc. It's a really crucial time for reconnection as a family.

So that's it! We are done! Is your house shinny and new? Is it on it's way? I'm so glad you could join me for our good housekeeping series this week. I wish you blessings on your homemaking endeavors! Please share comments with me and let me know how you manage your household and the tips you find helpful :)

Did you miss Friday, you can find him here. Have a great weekend!

"By the seventh day God had finished the work he had been doing; so on the seventh day he rested from all his work.  Then God blessed the seventh day and made it holy, because on it he rested from all the work of creating that he had done."

- Genesis 2: 2

Good Housekeeping - Friday

 Photo Credit

This week I am writing a series on good housekeeping. I'm sharing my rhythm and what works for me every day as I go about my week tidying up after all our boys! :)

Daily Wisdom

:: Dishes, 2-3 times per day

:: Straighten up main area for 10 minutes after each meal time

:: Check the chickens

:: Brush the dog

:: Read my scriptures

 

 

Friday

:: Clean Floors

I clean the floors in the bedrooms and bathrooms on the days I clean those rooms but on Fridays I target the kitchen floor, the living room and the hallway. First, I wipe down the base boards and scrape the lint and build up out of them. Then I vacuum well. I pull out the couch and vacuum under it and as needed I vacuum the couch including under the cushions every few weeks (be sure to rotate your couch cushions to avoid "butt groves" :)). In the kitchen I sweep the floors well and then mop them down being careful to move aside all dining chairs to get underneath them. I also wipe down the base boards. About every six months I rent a carpet shampooer and clean the carpets with a mix of Dr Bronner's lavender and peppermint soaps.

:: Dust

In the main areas I also dust (I dust the bedrooms and kitchen on their assigned days). I pay special attention to the computer area which becomes very dusty very quickly being sure to move things and get behind and underneath them. Make sure you get the back of furniture and desk areas as well as bookshelves, window sills, picture frames, wall corners, knick knacks, lamps and light fixtures.

:: Windows and Walls

I give the windows in the main areas a good wiping down as needed ( I wipe the outside of them on outside cleaning day ;)) I also wipe down the walls in the main areas of sticky finger build up paying special attention to the door frames and light switches.

Did you miss Thursday? It's right here :)

Tomorrow is our last cleaning day! Are you excited? I am!

"The name of the Lord is a strong fortress; the godly run to him and are safe."

- Proverbs 18:10

 

Good Housekeeping - Thursday

 Photo credit

This week I am writing a series on good housekeeping. I'm sharing my rhythm and what works for me every day as I go about my week tidying up after all our boys! :)

Daily Wisdom

:: Dishes, 2-3 times per day

:: Straighten up main area for 10 minutes after each meal time

:: Check the chickens

:: Brush the dog

:: Read my scriptures

 

 

Thursday

:: Laundry

This is my midweek laundry round up to keep it from getting out of control. I also like to wash bathroom towels on this day too and any other odds and ends like kitchen rags, my apron, oven mitts, etc.

:: Clean Kitchen

Wipe down counter tops, cabinets, door frames and the walls around food preparing and consuming areas. Wipe down baseboards, table tops, chairs, high chairs, stools, the outside and inside of the fridge and freezer. Wipe down appliances, clean out the stove inside and out, organize cupboards, wipe down shelves, etc. Throw away spoiled food and when needed rotate your food storage area.

My laundry room and kitchen are connected so I take this time to wipe down the outside of the washer and dryer when they need it and straighten up anything in the area that needs it. 

 

*Note: If you haven't had a regular housekeeping schedule the first week of this schedule may seem daunting. It may take you hours each day to complete the tasks. But rest assured if you do it for a week, the next week it will take you about 20 minutes to complete each daily task.

If you can't spare a week to get everything in order consider making a list of what needs to be done in each area and dividing it up over a month so that maybe you are working in each area, each day, for only 45 minutes but after the month is over you are caught up and can proceed to keep things in order with only a 20 minute or so commitment each day :)

If you missed Wednesday you can see it here. What do you think we are doing on Friday? Stay tuned and find out! :)

"One thing I ask of the LORD, this is what I seek: that I may dwell in the house of the LORD all the days of my life, to gaze upon the beauty of the LORD and to seek him in his temple."

-Psalm 27:4

Good Housekeeping - Wednesday

This week I am writing a series on good housekeeping. I'm sharing my rhythm and what works for me every day as I go about my week tidying up after all our boys! :)

Daily Wisdom

:: Dishes, 2-3 times per day

:: Straighten up main area for 10 minutes after each meal time

:: Check the chickens

:: Brush the dog

:: Read my scriptures

 

 

Wednesday

 

:: Grocery Shopping, Errands, Meal Planning

 

I keep an ongoing list in my planner where I jot down things we need each week such as vitamins, shampoo, olive oil - whatever we run out of. Then I go the store only once per week along with a trip to the bank, the pet store, whatever we need. I also map out my trip before a I go to plan the most efficient travel route between shops to save time.

"Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light to my path" 

- Psalm 119:105

Check out Tuesday here and stay tuned for Thursday!

Good Housekeeping - Tuesday

This week I am writing a series on good housekeeping. I'm sharing my rhythm and what works for me every day as I go about my week tidying up after all our boys! :)

Daily Wisdom

:: Dishes, 2-3 times per day

:: Straighten up main area for 10 minutes after each meal time

:: Check the chickens

:: Brush the dog

:: Read my scriptures

Tuesday

:: Clean the Bathrooms

Scrub down the shower and tub, wipe down fixtures, clean the toilet (throw away old reading materials from the back of the toilet and remember the toilet base), wipe down the sink and mirrors, sweep and mop the floor, change the towels out for clean ones, take out the trash, shake out or wash the rugs, clean out the medicine cabinet, wipe down the door frame and anywhere else with sticky finger build up.

 

:: Take the Trash to the Curb

(of course you want to do this the day before your own trash pick up :))

"To be self-controlled, pure, working at home, kind, and submissive to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be reviled" 

 - Titus 2:5

Monday can be found here :)

 

Wednesday is up next!

Good Housekeeping - Monday

This week I am writing a series on good housekeeping. I'm sharing my rhythm and what works for me every day as I go about my week tidying up after all our boys! :)

Daily Wisdom

:: Dishes, 2-3 times per day

:: Straighten up main area for 10 minutes after each meal time

:: Check the chickens

:: Brush the dog

:: Read my scriptures

Monday

:: Clean bedrooms. 

Strip sheets off bed, spray mattresses with tea tree oil, clean, 

dust, wipe down windows, window sills, and door frame (and any other sticky finger build up), 

vacuum (don't forget those baseboards and behind the door!)

:: Laundry. 

Wash, dry, fold and put away any laundry. 

Sew or iron-on patches, sort out clothing that is tattered or too small

"So I would have younger widows marry, bear children, manage their households, and give the adversary no occasion for slander."

- 1 Timothy 5:14

Stay tuned for Tuesday's rhythm! :)